A pickup line from a religious movie

"Do you know how many licks it takes to get the the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

She was taken back. Her eye's widened, her jaw dropped. How could some stranger walk off the street, buy some second rate DVD that she had never heard of, and manage to ask her the only question this week for which she had not been able to find a satisfactory answer? O sure, she had consulted Wikipedia as she did on every occasion, but even it was full of convoluted opinions and scientific guess work. She stuttered, "Not -t-t-t r-r-r-really," as she put the DVD in the bag and handed it across the counter. There was something in her face, maybe the crumbs of powdered doughnuts at the corners of her mouth, but he thought he saw something else. Something hidden, deeper, wanting him to not look away, or walk out the door without trying to follow through on what he had stumbled upon.

"Would you like to find out?”, he muttered. Where in the hell had that come from? He was shocked at the boldness, the brashness, yea, the giant set of Cojonies he had just grown. He couldn't remember the last time he had even thrown a line at a girl. Oh, wait.. yes he could. 1991. He has heard it in some awful movie mocking his religion, but he remembered the line anyway and used it. "Excuse me, " he had said to the J-Lo look alike except she had red hair, and a Bon Jovi tattoo that was starting to sag across her cankles. "You have the ass of a great artist."

Walking out of the Applebee's with Riblets adorning his T-shirt, he reminded himself to never use pick-up lines from religious movies.

Bringing his attention once again to the stunned retail clerk, he wondered if he wasn't about to have to throw away another one of his favorite T-Shirts.